Does Anything Really Matter?

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Does anything really matter?

Some people think it does, some people know it does.

Some people think it doesn't, some people know it doesn't.

and does it really matter?

Life is full of conditions and we get to create our own lives using the conditions that are present, the conditions not yet manifested, and many more that we are completely impossibly unaware of. What you choose to do with your life and how you choose to enjoy it are completely up to you.

In intimate relationships, with family, friends, or partners, there’s one thing we could appreciate, support. What does that even look like? I think to most people it is quite different and can come in many shapes and forms. How do we balance the act of giving while also making sure we’re taking care of ourselves? A key to this balance lies in three powerful phrases:

“What can I do?”, “How can I help?”, and “What do you need?”

When you offer them with intention and genuine care, they can strengthen connections and build a sense of mutual trust and respect. They really need to have meaning behind them for most of the people I meet and I've observed at this vibration they can only offered genuinely when the host is coming from a place of abundance, all divinely orchestrated of course. Hold on, stay the course, and trust that the Universe is working in divine timing.

This idea of giving from a full cup can often be essential for emotional well-being and sustainable relationships. As psychologist Nicole LePera, The Holistic Psychologist, often emphasizes: You can’t pour from an empty cup.

If you’re feeling emotionally exhausted, depleted, annoyed, burned out, or that your boundaries have been ignored, offering those three phrases can quickly feel like an emotional burden and lead to more problems for you and things for you to transmute or attend to instead of how they are intended, a gift. AND That's ok, you need to stay safe, if you don't take care of yourself, who will? Please take care out there and protect your gorgeous, beautiful hearts. That’s why self-regulation and self-care must come first, and the people who are wise will realize that and also be happy filling their own cup and overflowing to you when they can. The focus is always inwards, that's where the love is. It is a fountain, like a wellspring eternal, like a torus, all you need to do is breathe and do whatever you need to do to shine. Stop bugging other people. Either help them fill their cup with your gorgeously over flowing cup or leave them alone. That's true self-respect and if you don't have that then you certainly are signalling you are not capable of giving it. Look for the red flag that if someone isn't filling your cup then they probably don't respect themselves enough to be a pillar in your life. And that's ok, there are plently of pillars of light available and the one within you is by far the strongest, as it is connected to all the pillars of light on the planet. Keep shining.

Self-Awareness Before Support

Before you ask, “What can I do? How can I help?” it’s important to ask yourself: What do I need?

When we aren’t aware of our own needs, it’s easy to fall into patterns of codependency where we give and give to others at the expense of ourselves. True interdependence in relationships means we care for each other while maintaining our own sense of individuality and boundaries. That happens when we’ve taken the time and done the work to really know ourselves. Please trust yourself here. If you’re feeling drained or unsure, instead of immediately rushing to help someone else, do an inventory on what you can do to replenish your own energy. Enjoy life a little bit, find some joy, and move back up the vibrational scale. LePera often discusses the importance of grounding yourself before trying to show up for others because, when you’re out of alignment, your help may come from a place of resentment or obligation, not genuine care, and that energy in itself isn't something I would imagine ever bringing to any relating-ship. How about you? No? Then let's affirm to release any negative attachments, and focus on the fact that you are enough, have enough, enjoy enough, and so on.. You are enough.. repeat it: I am enough, exactly as I am. In the words of Louise Hay in her classic book You Can Heal Your Life: In the infinity of the world I am whole and complete, or something like that. Here is the book, 100% game changer for anyone on the Path.

Managing When Your Partner is Taking Care of Their Cup, and How to Show Up in This Phase

When your partner is focused on filling their own cup, it’s essential to honour their process rather than take it personally. True support doesn’t always mean fixing, doing, or even saying the right thing, it often means simply being present- with yourSelf!! Give them the space they need to recharge while staying open and available. Respect their boundaries, offer quiet support, and listen with curiosity, inside and to them, instead of assuming what they need. If they ask for time alone, trust that it’s about their self-care, not a reflection of your worth. Show up by holding space, creating a peaceful environment, or offering small gestures of care without expectation. And while you support them, don’t forget to nourish yourself too. A healthy relationship thrives when both people prioritize their well-being, creating a foundation of mutual respect and love. The more you trust in your own light, the easier it becomes to let others tend to theirs.

The Art of Living in the Love Vibration

Once you’ve taken the time to care for yourself, then you can show up in a way that feels whole and grounded. That’s when the three phrases come to life.

“What can I do?”This is about being present and offering specific help. It’s about showing up with clear intention, rather than simply saying, “Let me know if you need anything,” and hoping it’ll work itself out.

“How can I help?”This asks the other person what their needs are, acknowledging that everyone’s experience is different and that the way they need support may change from day to day. It creates space for communication and mutual understanding.

“What do you need?”This can be the most vulnerable of the three, because it invites you to listen deeply, not just to the words, but to the emotions and unspoken needs beneath the surface. Sometimes, people don’t know what they need until they feel safe enough to express it.

Boundaries Are Your Best Friend

While these phrases are incredibly powerful, boundaries allow them to work without overextending you. LePera often talks about the importance of setting clear boundaries so that we can protect our energy, while still being able to offer genuine help to those we care about.

Remember, boundaries don’t mean you or they don’t care; they mean you or they are honoring your/their own energy so that you/they have the capacity to show up for others when it really matters.

If You’re Low on Energy, Do You First

The last part of this is where the real magic happens: Take care of yourself before you try to take care of everyone else. If you don't let them take care of themselves then you are destroying any chance for success and happiness. You choose act a certain way, you decide your Future. Will it be separation or will it be magic. You decide.

Sometimes, we’re so focused on helping others that we forget to help ourselves succeed in our goals which could be a healthy relationship. Breathe, Relax, Meditate, Join a course on Meditation. Otherwise life's twists and turns often leads to burnout, frustration, and resentment, things that ultimately hurt both ourselves and the relationships we were ultimatley aiming to nurture.

Take a step back when you’re feeling drained or alone and refocus on your own needs. Do whatever it takes to fill up your cup: meditate, take a walk, read, or just be present in the moment. Once your energy feels restored, you can approach the world around you with a clear mind, an open heart, and a true desire to help. My advice: let those around you or lead them to a clear mind, and open heart, and the rest will unfold naturally.

Self-awareness is a key ingredient in offering genuine support and living and breathing in a high vibe relating ship. Give from your overflow, not from your depletion. Give from your light, not your sickness. Let go of your ego and give from the heart. If you can't give then go inward and start there. This is how you create deep, nourishing connections that benefit both you and those you care about. At the end of the day, when you’re grounded and fulfilled, you can offer power, grace, and flexibility in the relating ships without losing yourself, your integrity, or any of your light in the process.

Your Partner on the Path,

Chetana